[UNHOLY STAPLE BISCUITS AN UPDATE SIGNIFIED BY CAPITAL LETTERS]
WELLY WELL WELL, I'm back.
Any input on my sister? Did she finally say fuck? Is she moar well educated in the art of internet?
Also, did I miss anything important?

<disregard all of this>

She's been working really hard lately, so I'll be taking over her position as maid around our home.
If you'd be so kind as to visit with her and help her Lrn2Internet, then please head to her page. I'm sure she'd love to talk.
Thank you.

The other reason why I'm signing off for a bit is because of the mass idiocy accumulating due to the surprising Newfag Influx, and I'm tired of dealing with it.
So yeah. Give her your regards if you have any special messages for me.
Thanks again!
I'll be back in a few.

Edit: Well, apparently my Walfas art is considered against portal rules. You know, I might join DeviantArt just for the sake of having a decent art portal and moderators who don't utterly suck Tom's throbbing cock to remain in control of their biased positions. This art portal sucks huge dick, might I add, especially after Ego got hijacked and decided to unscout FUCKING EVERYONE. Seriously, what the fuck. And I got unscouted for NO FUCKING REASON. It doesn't even say why the fuck you get unscouted. It just sends you a message from M-Bot saying 'YOU'RE UNSCOUTED FAGGOT'. It's so retarded in so many ways.

Go on. Have a listen. Yukari will be happy if you do.
A history on Ms. Yakumo.
In honor of News Post 69, I present to you Ms. Yakumo and Ms. Saigyouji making out. Generally SFW.
And now some mild NSFW.
AND NOW SERIOUS NSFW.

And I'd like to share it with the world. Remember to choose high quality, and look at the lyrics!
Here's the backstory and other info on Flandre Scarlet, the little vampire girl who the song references.
Better depiction of Flandre.

[UNHOLY PRETZELS ANOTHER UPDATE?!?1?1!?11!?]
Well. Here's a list of the people I've decided to Touhou-Characterize:
- Me.
- Albino.
- Wartooth. CHANGED
- Igott.
- Rabid.
- SEFG.
- Sanchez.
- Wyvvern.
- Midnight.
- fourinone.
- Palidian. NEW

[OHAI MOAR CAPS EQUALS MOAR UPDATES SO BUY NOW]
I have decided to do a "You Are Like This Touhou Character", since some of you fit some of them REALLY well.
So, LETS DO THIS:

Me: Yukari Yakumo. Manipulative, relaxed, horribly lazy, and highly intelligent. I am pretty much Yukari minus the Border Manipulation (T^T I REALLY want that ability. I'd be like friggin' JESUS or some shit.), flamboyant clothes. Oddly enough, I have a very intelligent friend and a very mischevious friend who both kinda fill the roles of Ran and Chen. Odd.

Albino: Suika Ibuki, all the way. Sure, you're not a pettanko loli, but you sure as hell love alchohol as much as she does. She's never been 100% sober, and carries around a gourd of INFINITE SAKE. FUKKEN INFINITE. INFINITE=DRINKING ALL THE DAMN TIME. Also insanely powerful (in your case, Intranets powerful), and controls density, therefore having the ability to make herself bulletproof or light as air. Or BOTH. Also, you seem to visit my post so often, it's kinda like how Suika visits/mooches off of the Hakurei Shrine.

igott: Marisa Kirisame. Both of you seem like intense yet relaxed people, you both work hard at what you do (You at bass/guitar, Marisa at magic), have messy rooms (apologies if I'm wrong, it seemed that way due to your pic), and both of you do drugs (You with pot/weed; Marisa does ''MAGIC MUSHROOMS"). Also very hostile towards those who are irritating to you.

Sanchez: Totally Hong Meiling. Both martial-arts masters (well, at least in training), both hard workers who are lazy on occasion, and both wear Olive colored clothes. Also both obscure in society, and no one can remember your actual name off the top of their head. Reason why I have to go on this huge hunt to find your full username (Sanchez150...Oh damn it) and why Meiling is known as China.

SEFG: Cirno. I'm sorry, but you seem to give off that 'I'm a 9' aura. Considering the fact that using awesomeface has become your signature, I can't help but imagine that's the expression you wear ALL THE DAMN TIME. Thus, you look utterly stupid in my imagination. But I know you're smart as we, but you also seem to act dumb or spastic sometimes. Thus: Cirno. The stupid, infamous, and rumored supergenius/ultrapowerful being.

Rabid: Utsuho Reiuji. You also give off the aura of aloofness and general emptyheadedness, along with EXTREME HOSTILITY for generally small issues, like you wanting to bat people to death for NO GOOD REASON OTHER THAN THE FACT IT'S FUN. Utsuho happens to be a Hell Raven with the ability to control Nuclear Fusion. Therefore, she's a facking WALKING NUKE CANNON. Or flying. Either way, due to lack of prominent intelligence, she could be easily swayed by someone to NUKE THE CRAZY BATNUTS out of someone if convinced properly. Just like you seem to be like.

Wartooth: CAPTAIN MINAMITSU MOTHERFUCKING MURASA. FUCK YEAH.I REALIZED THAT WARTOOTH IS A BADASS TROLL SO I FIGURED HE DOES EVERYTHING FOR THE LULZ. CAPTAIN MOTHERFUCKING MURASA WAS SOME POOR GIRL WHO DROWNED AT SEA BECAME A GHOST AND HAS THE ABILITY TO SINK SHIPS. THE ABILITY IS ACTIVATED ON PURPOSE AND SHE CHOSE TO GO AHEAD AND SINK SHIPS FOR NO REASON OTHER THAN THE FACT THAT SHE CAN. THUS DOING IT FOR THE LULZ. JUST LIKE WARTOOTH. ALSO SINCE SHES A FUCKING AWESOME CAPTAIN SHES A BADASS SO THE DESCRIPTION FITS WELL.

Wyvvern: Patchouli Knowledge. Mainly because you seem to never come on, so it seems like you're stuck in the SDM Library like Patchouli. Not suggesting Basement Dwellage, but still. Also, you come across as an intelligent and sensible guy who knows what he's doing, as with Patchy.

Fourinone: I guess Yuyuko Saigyouji. You're really relaxed, and just chillin' even when there's a guy ready to sue you. Mainly because it seems like Rabid is your subordinate, who is Youmu Konpaku in Yuyuko's place. And it seems like you have him do the lackey work as Yuyuko would Youmu. Or like how Yukari would Ran, but you don't seem like Yukari and I'm already Yukari.

Midnight: Koakuma. You're just kinda there to help us out, and be a nice person to all of us, so in other words: Support character. Also, you seem to be as mischievous as Koakuma, as well as at the same level of sensibility and manners. The Little Devil suits you.

Palidian: Eirin Yagokoro. You left the want to defeat the trolls in favor of a less restricted life. Eirin left the Moon to go develop a friggin' Immortality Elixir. You're an ex-White Knight. She's an ex-Lunarian [who have an issue with the Earth.]. Also, you both share these traits:
"She does not suffer fools gladly, and because of her incredibly high intelligence, she can come across as conceited, impatient and condescending at times to those not sharp enough to follow her explanations immediately."

I'll do more later, and probably compile the ones I think of and these ones in a huge post.

[WHOA HEY THE CAPITAL LETTERS SIGNIFY AN UPDATE]
Pic Links added because I'm bored.
VISIT PICS OR YOU WILL BECOME A FAGGOT
AND FAGGOTS WILL BE SHOT

Yep.
I mean, it would be pretty damn cool to meet a fictional character.
My Top Five in Order Of Preference:

1. Yukari Yakumo. An enigmatic, beautiful, and very intelligent Youkai who manipulates borders of reality. Also very lazy, vague, calm, relaxed, and unpredictable. And is followed by a Kitsune and a Cat. It'd be great to meet her in person and just spend one day with her. T'would also be cool if I could learn how to divide by ze- I mean, ''Manipulate Borders" like she can.
[DIVISION BY ZERO DIMENSIONAL GAPS AND APPEARANCE SEEN HERE.]

2. Marisa Kirisame. Energetic, cunning, observant, and utterly awesome. Also steals FUKKEN EVERYTHING. She's a witch, after all. Flying on a broomstick, going through her ever eventful daily schedule, and Lrn2MASTER SPARK make a meeting with the crazy black-white worthwhile, ze.
[MASTER SPARK QUICK LESSON SEEN HERE.]

3. Sakuya Izayoi. Tentative, patient, and loyal. Obvious qualities for the Perfect and Elegant Maid. Also accused of wearing breast pads (This is apparently TOTAL BULLSHIT AND SHE WILL KILL YOU IF IT IS MENTIONED). Help clean the SDM and get paid, learn how to throw a knife/knives, and Lrn2ZA WARUDO from the time-manipulating meido would be a kickass day.
[WHAT WILL RAPE YOU IN THE SKULL IF YOU SAY PADS]

4. Coach. L4D2's ever-awesome big black dude who keeps everyone alive and positive. Helping fight through the zombie apocalypse with him would be pretty damn epic in my book.
[COACH IN ALL HIS AWESOMENESS]

5. Reimu Hakurei. Described as carefree, lazy, relaxed, and PINED FOR MONIES. DONATE NAO. Heh, living at the constantly visited Hakurei Shrine would be an adventure enough. It'd be nice, just sitting on the front porch, enjoying tea with a relaxed Miko in a calm summer breeze... I can only imagine.
[DONATE YOU BASTARDS]

I dunno why I made this post other than the fact that i kinda felt like it and the other one was getting kinda full.
So. Yeah.
EXPRESS YOUR OPINION
FAGGOTS WILL BE SHOT

[WHOA HEY LOOK AT THE CAPITAL LETTERS]
New Art Is Up!
Please go check it out!

You know, I don't feel happy that it's the New Year.
It feels empty, the 'accomplishment' of surviving another year.
It's another year of the same old shit. AGAIN.
At least, that's what it FEELS like.
But then again:
New Year equals New Me. Clean Slate, y'know?
I'm should work harder. Not be utterly lazy.
And I should be optimistic about stuff.
Manage my time as if it were College already.
Bring my grades higher than just 93s. Or whatever in fuck's name they are. I just know that I could be doing much better.
Improve my art.
Try new stuff.
Stop Trolling IRL.
Make all this happen by summer.
Then I'll be happy.

New Year's Resolution: Improve myself. In every aspect possible.
Now I feel happy.

Yep.
I'd just like to wish these people a Kickass New Year (Order does not designate ranking):

- AlbinoTitan
- Rabid-Monkey101
- igott
- Wartooth118
- Sanchez150894
- 51430
- SuparEFG
- Yutamo
- fourinone
- eightball6219
- xellon
- C1ph3r
- Strategize
- SentineL-EX
- Midnight113
- Kylem7
- Shadowsman
- HeAvEn-SmiLE
- Wraith2000
- The-Condor
- Stickman91
- Wyvvern-Guy
- sonic98
- Sinitech

IF YOU THINK I AM MISSING SOMEONE PLEASE NOTIFY ME
NO I AM NOT PUTTING TOM FULP ON THIS LIST
HELL I WAS JUST ABOUT TO PUT THAT HE'S A FAGGOT BUT HE ISN'T
KINDA

I love you all.
Thank you for being the internet embodiments of EPIC WIN.
Happy New Year.

<3 zi~ <3

Yep.
I gotted Borderlands, Raiden IV (CRAZY-ASS DANMAKU GOODNESS), a sexy new watch, and some other shit. The stuff I listed is the important things.

So yeah.
Happy Jesus-is-born-and-Santa-is-not-the-mai n-fucking-point Day.

INCREASE THE HAPPINESS MOTHERFUCKERS.

I really, really thought staying away from the internet would help me out in my life.
But it really didn't due to two factors:
1: I COULDN'T STAY AWAY BECAUSE SELF TREATMENT FOR ADDICTIONS IS IMPOSSIBLE
2: I have a horrible tendency to just go do something else.

I know I said "I'll update in an month", but I failed my self test.

Anyway, about why I did that:
Parents said "YOURE TAKING TOO LONG FOR YOUR HOMEWORK FAGGOT"
I said "FUCK I KNOW SHUT THE FUCK UP I KNOW FROM THE OVER 9000 OTHER TIMES YOUVE SAID THAT"
Decides to leave NG to get parents off back.
Fails utterly after 3 days.
Sets goal.
Fails utterly after 2 days.
Gets horribly more depressed.

Fuck...
I think I'm depressed because I've driven myself into a hole that I can't get out of at this point...
I'm intelligent in subjects I absolutely hate (read: ALL OF THEM), my passion for art is not practical beside my dream of making some kind of Graphic Novel/Story, I study THREE FUCKING INSTRUMENTS, and have a wandering attention which is getting me killed.

That or I'm just hating my friends lately. I mean, for God's Sake, they're awesome guys, but honestly, I can't help but continually see the irritating sides of them. One's a SUPERCHRISTIAN, another is REALLY DAMN ANNOYING AT LEAST 80% OF THE TIME, and all of the others are either total douches or BASEMENT DWELLERS. FO SRS.

It may be also because I'm lonely...
Sigh...

Anyway, straying from my depression rant, I'd like to talk about Sonicfaggotry and 2-D Gaming.
Here's what I think: The good old Blue Blur is still awesome today if you consider the 2-D era and SA2 (In my opinion, that was the last good game involving Sonic EVER). However, nowadays, the kiddies of the world were introduced to Sonic during the era of the shit games (e.g. Unleashed, Heroes, Secret Rings, etc.) and think those were actually good. This then turns into "OMG BEST GAME SERIES EVER". Now, what really pisses me off is that, If you ever show a Sonicfag the 2-D era, they will react like this: "OMGWTFBBQ THESE R BAD GRAFFIX AND WTF THERES NO WEREWOLF MODE ITS JUST RUNNING AROUND I NEED MY HOMING ATTACK AND MY CHAOS CONTROL AND A GUN".
Now as for me, I became a 2-D game fan at the most unlikely of locations: My Dentist's Office. Why? He had a legitimate multi-cartridge system for I believe a Dreamcast. I would always play Sonic The Hedgehog 2 there, along with Dig Dug. It was a marvelous machine. I have a CD game, SEGA SMASH PACK, which lead me to have loves of many other genres of games. STH2 was still there, and I thought Tails was a girl. I got a love of 2-D Fighters as well with the game Comix Zone ( I believe that's what it's called), and love of RPG/Strategy games with Shining Force.
Nowadays, I'm a lover of all kinds of genres: FPS, 3PS, RPG, 2-D Danmaku, Strategy... Hell, everything but those retarded ass puzzle games that all resemble Tetris in some way (but Tetris still rocks).
Why I'm ranting about my love of gaming, I believe it's because Sonicfags have ruined Sonic by supporting the Shit3-D era when Sega should have done something better to improve the gameplay without changing to 3-D. But that's nigh impossible, so Sonic's been doomed from the start. Ololol.

In other news, I'm going to try and get some new art up more often. Expect more Walfas stuff, 'cause that's fun to make. Also, a holiday themed thing I made should be up before Christmas. Also, if you haven't noticed, I have been unscouted due to someone in my scout line fucking up. Dammit.

Well, I guess that's my rant for today. I don't know why I do rants, but I just like to vent my opinions. So yeah...
Happeh Holidays for all of ya. I'll be available at random periods of the day like I usually am, since I get on and off my iPod Touch at sporadic times.

Also, saying iTouch is retarded. It's a fucking iPod Touch.
Finally, what I just realized, is that I get HORRIBLY PISSED OFF when someone sees me using my littled bastard, and they say, "AWW COOL IPHONE ITS AN IPHONE I KNOW THESE THINGS". At one time, I honestly said "GODDAMMIT ITS AN IPOD TOUCH YOU STUPID FAGGOT THERES A FUCKING HUGE DIFFERENCE."
After which, I lol'd.

So yeah. Happy Holidays.
Enjoy my art.

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Please Decode Everything...
Thank You...

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Hm.
Here I am again.
Armed with nothing but the ability of psychic manipulation.
Faced with masked soldiers holding rifles.
Same old, same old.
Yet still, this is something always exhilirating.
Oh dear, they're firing at me.
That's irritating; the noise of gunfire.
Well, damn. Stopping the bullets is my first priority.
Ok, there.
Y'know, fuck just throwing them back for once.
Let's get creative, shall we?
Let's burst your ribcage open.
And you, how about your lungs compress?
I'd really like to see your spine.
I'll burst your head, I guess. I feel like that right now.
Hahahaha, this is always so fun.
Oh, well, who's this here?
Scared, are you?
Don't worry, I'll make it as PAINFUL as possible...
Think... All of the bones of the adult human body...
Ok, so there's my targets...
Three...
Two...
One...
...
...
...Ah, What a euphoric noise!
Every bone in the human body simultaneously exploding...
There's nothing else quite like it...
Well, time to keep moving.
There's people to kill.

[FILE]

NOTE: Storyline takes place between 2010 and 2013.

Profile No. 7
Sara Raine-Project 07
a.k.a: "The Manipulator"

<PUBLIC RECORD>
Nation of Birth: England
Gender: Female
Blood Type: A+
Birthdate: March 12, 1997
Hair Color: Mahogany
Eye Color: Light Brown
Weight: 117 lbs
Status: Alive
Race: Caucasian
Parents: Will & Leah Raine

<PERSONAL HISTORY>
This young woman was procured after being found unconcious a couple miles from a mental hospital. After research into her history, she was found to be a mentally disturbed sadist, who eventually ended up being sent to the hospital after beating, kidnapping, and torturing someone who humiliated her during school. After staying for what was discovered to be a mere nine days, she escaped from her chamber and proceeded to cheerily kill all of the hospital personnel (81 total) in highly inhumane methods. This was all due to the fact that one employee who serves her lunch was busy and lost track of time, and she was greatly frustrated by this. However, her mental capacity was considerably high, along with her IQ. In lieu of sentencing her to death for her mass murder, Ms. Raine was taken to Wavelength, where her mental capacity was heavily magnified; thus resulting in 07.

<personality>
Dark, very morbid. Enjoys harming people emotionally or physically. Has a very high sense of remorse, but supresses it. Advocates use of inhumane methodology in combat. Highly sadistic; loves seeing people in pain. Smiles sincerely and laughs psychotically as she kills.

<WAVELENGTH FILE>
Recorded Augments:
- ESP Magnification Implant: Drastically magnifies ESP ability. (note: if task provides too much mental stress, subject blacks out)
- Heightened muscle strength
- Strengthened bone resilience
- Vaccinated for all common diseases
- Mental Concentration Implant

Known Trainers/Handlers:
Dr. Eric Ceros
Dr. Jonathan Icarus
Dr. Sirius Peterson
Dr. Zach Brendan

Known Weapons Preferred:
- Combat environment
- ESP Telekinetic ability
- Knives

FEATURE: BORDERLANDS QUICK REVIEW BY ZEROINSANITY

//Gameplay: 10
The game never makes it unsatisfying to kill anything, collect new weapons, or get into a massive firefight. I believe in the gameplay departmen, it doesn't fail to deliver.
//Graphical Quality: 10
Some weirdnesses occured with me, like it'd still be loading 5 minutes into an area. Nothing big though. I really love the graphical change to a comic-esque quality to Pandora.
//Storyline: 7
Sure, it has potential to becoming a great storyline. But the way it was executed, NO. Even with my hyperactive imagination, I couldn't make much of even this story. It is very close to be on par with ACFA in vagueness, but at least it has some structure.
//Innovativeness: 10
A random weapon generator which has the potential to generate 1.7 Billion firearms wich all are different in some unique way. Along with a shoving a fast-paced shooter element and mixing it with an RPG (now I know Fallout 3 did that, but this is different. You have to AIM, instead of relying on VATS. I believe it's much more satisfying than a targeting system.), this is one of the most interesting games I've ever played due to these elements. It's fufilling.
>>PROS:
Insane Weapon Variety
Co-op is Brilliant
Open World Gameplay
Beautiful Graphics
RPG Elements Executed Nicely
>>CONS:
Vague Storyline
Aiming Issues
Single Player is Lonely

/\/\/\/\Overall Score: 9.5

~~Recommend For Purchase Immediately: Yes
~~Recommend For Purchase After Rental: Yes
~~DO NOT BOTHER: No

[Latest News:]
I am back for this rest of the weekend.
I'm going to be buying Borderlands soon.

[HEADS UP] - I rented Borderlands, and will make a review on my next post.

Yeah. Thanksgiving weekend's coming up, so I plan on signing off for a bit.
You know.
Since an IRL family is a bit more important than anon friends OL.
So yeah.

Anyway, I feel like conveying some thoughts right now...
[TL;DR ALERT; I'M RANTING HERE]

What's nice is that for now, it's not cold as bittersweet hell yet. God, I hate the cold. I REALLY hate the cold. I would rather die in scalding hot water than freezing cold water, I swear.

Also, those of you who know your math, I REALLY FRIGGIN HATE PROOFS. I mean, they're completely frickin useless, I swear, man. I mean, if one person's proved it with all those BS theorems, postulates, or whatever, than WHY IN EFFING HELLS NAME DO I HAVE TO REPEAT THEIR WORK. Screw proofs, those useless bastards. If it's proven ANYWHERE at least once, and the teacher knows about it, and you use something that is supported by a proof already, then WHY DO I HAVE TO PROVE IT THEN, DAMMIT?!

I'm kinda sad and angry today. My compy's saying "Replace Now" regarding the battery, only after a 2 year run. What the hell. I'm just like, "Dammit." Oh well, it's not like they're impossible to find, but still. 2 years and I have to replace the battery already.

I feel really damn stressed lately. There's this entire effing chapter on those GODFORSAKEN PROOFS in math, I've got this research project thing on Nikola Tesla (which is so damn time consuming... And then I'm just tired of my school in general, since pretty much every guy here acts like a total fag basement dweller, always raving about SUPAR FUCKING CAWL OF DOODY MODURN WARFARE TWO SUPER FUCKING COOL LEVEL 210 PRESTIGE or whatever. Every one of the guys at my school. I fucking swear. I mean, it's a pretty kickass looking game, but it's turning people into basement dwellers.

Do any of you hate it when one of your friends decide to mention something you showed them a long time ago, and then they show it to you again newfag style, and laugh profusely while you're thinking "Holy eff, it's really not that funny anymore"?

Hey, did you know that those testing bubble sheets are called Scantrons? Seriously! They are!

Anyone here play Armored Core: for Answer? Please say so if you have, and do give it a try if you can find it!

Another point I'd like to make: Does anyone here go back to places you've commented on just to see the person's reaction to what you said? For some reason, I feel like people ignore me if they don't respond. And then, I feel like nobody loves me. Then I get sad. Also, when I go back to those places, usually it's already been a long time ever since I commented, and I get a bad urge to say "Remember me from that one post and I said something you liked?" And I believe I've done that once, and then they just said "No" and then were weirded out by me. This made me sad again. And I just hate it when there's those douchebags that completely detract from an engaging discussion (both IRL and OL), and just make some gay comment on terrorists or some other crap. I mean really. What the hell.

Also, why is it that so many people diss electronic music? I mean, it kicks more ass than rap, and owns country music's ass any day. So why people hate it is beyond me.
If at this point in time you hate electronic, I deplore you to listen to:
<Note: Most songs on this list are Japanese, but I just love their ability to make kickass electronic music.>
- Sleepyhead by Passion Pit
- Marisa Stole The Precious Thing by IOSYS
- Scarlet Zone by *unknown*
- Lucky Star RedAlice remix
- Bad Apple!!
- The Homework Never Ends! by Innocent Key
- More & More by DJ Hixxy
- Gangster Tripping by Fatboy Slim

Well. I dunno why I decided to do this rant post.
I felt like it, but now I'm questioning whether or not people will care at all.
Well, screw you uneducated bastards who think "OH IM SO DAMN COOL I DONT HAVE TO READ THIS CAUSE IM SO PRO AND I DONT GIVE A FUCK ABOUT THIS WOMAN NO SIR BITCH". Because if you think that, you're a egomanaical dumbass who has his head WAY TOO FAR up your ass and needs to rip it out painfully.

So. All of you who see this, have a happy Thanksgiving or whatever. Get the fuck out of your basement and spend some time with the people who unconditionally love you for no other reason than you are you and the fact that you were made with your mom's womb and the sperm of the guy she married. And who will still love you, even if you make them spend 100s of dollars on Hot Pockets every month to feed the Level 113 soldier on his 14th Prestige. Give the love back, just this once, you mooching whores.

Yeah. So this is ZeroInsanity, signing off until further notice.
<3 All y'alls.

//zi.

[tl;dr version]
DERP DERP DERP DERP
DESU DESU DESU
OMGWTFBBQ HAX ZERG RUSH OMG
FUCK
SOMETHING ABOUT LOLI AND RAPE
RAVE MUSIC
SEX
DRUGS
AND SUPAR KOOL CODMW2 OMFG.